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Marimbo/dialogue
During Cabbage Facepunch Bonanza *''If unaligned'' ** Marimbo: Hey! Hey you! Come and join the party! Just see the gardener there and tell him you want to join my side. *''If aligned with the Godless'' (male) **'Marimbo:' Goodness! Another handsome Godless hunk? At this rate I might join up myself! *''If aligned with the Godless'' (female) **'Marimbo:' I see you've joined Team Shirtless to be near Holstein. I don't blame you! *''If aligned with Brassica Prime'' ** Marimbo: Oooh, look everyone! A veggie! Hey there leaf-face, having fun down there? *''If aligned with Marimbo'' ** Marimbo: Keep up the good work! Not that it matters much but we've got that cabbage on the run. ** Marimbo: But he can't run, can he? On the roll. We have the cabbage on the roll. ** Marimbo: Cabbage roll...is that a type of food? I'm hungry now. Someone bring me a cabbage roll! **'Player:' Who are you? *** Marimbo: 'I'm Marimbo! Hooray for me! *** '''Marimbo: '''Grab a drink and I'll tell you a little bit about myself. *** '''Marimbo: '''You see, I'm the goddess of having a good time. And monkeys. Because it really isn't a party until there are monkeys. *** '''Marimbo: '''And drinking and good food and music, of course. But still... monkeys! *** '''Marimbo: '''Some people call me a hedonist, but that's a little harsh. *** '''Marimbo: '''Hedonists really only care about having fun themselves. I'm all about everyone having fun! *** '''Marimbo: '''Anyway, I was here last time all this fighting happened. I've been away partying ever since. *** '''Marimbo: '''But now I'm back! So we can start having fun again! *** '''Marimbo: '''Speaking of which, where's your drink? Where's my drink? *** '''Marimbo: '''Drinks all round! **'Player: 'How did you become a goddess? This option only appears if another has been selected first ***'Marimbo: You know what? I can't remember. ***'Marimbo:' I have a strange dream sometimes that I was just an average giant monkey in a vast jungle full of giant monkeys. ***'Marimbo:' I can't remember the name of the place, but the whole world was a jungle, and giant monkeys like we were in charge. ***'Marimbo:' We weren't smart or anything. We were just animals. Swinging in trees, eating each other's lice. The usual. ***'Marimbo:' Then one day I just 'woke up'. ***'Marimbo:' There was a statue nearby that turned out to be a dead god. And a huge, empty wine barrel. ***'Marimbo:' Someone later told me he was a god of hedonism too. He was on a trawl of different worlds, challenging mortals to drinking contest for a bit of lark. ***'Marimbo:' So when he found out about a world of giant monkeys he went there in a flash, grabbed me and started dishing out the booze. ***'Marimbo:' It's a pity I never got to know him. Everything I found out was from his followers, who were all in mourning. ***'Marimbo:' So I thought 'Marimbo, let's cheer these guys up', and called for more wine. ***'Marimbo:' Everyone perked right up once we cracked open a new barrel, I can tell you. ***'Marimbo:' It's a shame I lost that drinking horn. The Fancy one with all the sparkles. I wonder where it went? ***'Marimbo:' When we were done they proclaimed me the new god of having a good time. And since that meant enjoying myself all day, who was to argue? ***'Marimbo:' It could be worse. They could have wanted me to be the god of indigestion or back pain. This is a sweet gig! **'Player: '''Tell me about your followers. *** '''Marimbo: '''Urgh, do you think I keep a list or something? *** '''Marimbo: '''I don't mind who turns up, so long as they have fun, you know. *** '''Marimbo: '''If you have to write all this down, then you can start with monkeys. I mean, it's pretty obvious. ****''If Monkey Madness is complete ***** Marimbo: And I'm counting YOU as a monkey too. ***** Marimbo: Don't think I didn't see you turn into a monkey that one time. *****'Player:' I don't know what you mean. ***** Marimbo: Oh relax! Turning into a monkey is no bad thing. I've seen people turn into far worse in my time. *** Marimbo: '''Then you have anyone who wants to have a good time. Not in a bad way, so bandits and bullies can get out. *** '''Marimbo: Anyone else who lives to eat and drink and make merry can join the party if they want. I'm easy! *** Marimbo: Oh, and anyone who has ever drunk that Braindeath 'rum' stuff and survived. I'm thinking of making them saints. *** Marimbo: I don't know what's in it, but it kicks like a mule. **'Player: '''Why should I follow you? *** '''Marimbo:' Follow me? Follow me where? I'm not moving. *** Marimbo: Well, the world is spinning a little... maybe a little food will settle my stomach. *** Player: No, I mean, why should I follow you in this event? *** Marimbo: Oh that! Well we have cool monkey capes and stuff. *** Marimbo: Plus we have the best food. *** Brassica Prime: Lies! Lies and heresy! My forces form the most delicious and nutritious faction! *** Marimbo: Shove it in your roots, veggie! *** Brassica Prime: Choke on a banana, monkey-features! *** Marimbo: Now that sounds like a very good idea! Cheers, Brassica! *** Marimbo: Sorry, what were you saying? **'Player: '''Why are you fighting Brassica? ***'Marimbo:' Fighting? We're not fighting! ***'Marimbo:' This is a party! We're having fun! ***'Player:' But won't one of you have to die after this? ***'Marimbo:' Pfft, you think I want the Orb of Jazz, or whatever that thing is? ***'Marimbo:' I don't really care about that at all. Fun and good times, that's my philosophy. ***'Marimbo:' Let Stick-in-the-mud-domin and Zamo-grump play Sliske's game. We're just going to have a party! ***'Player:' What if one of them claims the stone? ***'Marimbo:' Then I'll still have a good time! **'Marimbo:' I mean, I might take my followers away if things start to get rough. ***'Marimbo:' The last God Wars were not fun at all. If it gets that bad then I'll probably take my monkeys - and anyone else who wants to come - and go elsewhere. ***'Marimbo:' People think I'm just some dumb monkey. They underestimate me, and don't know how far I'd go for my friends. ***'Marimbo:' If anyone goes after Ape Atoll they'll find it empty. All my monkey friends will be with me, laughing in the warring gods' stupid faces. **'Player:' That's everything. ***'Marimbo: '''Have fun!